Lil Arlo - Arlo Fire
Jan 5, 2020
In a nutshell, this is basically Wesley Willis' Career If He Was A Rapper, the unfunny ep...

Where do I start with this album?! Let's talk about the lyrics first...they don't even rhyme. Now, don't get me wrong, sometimes not rhyming works, to some extent (Take for instance, Phonte's verse on Whatever You Say). The thing is, it probably would have worked under the circumstance of it purposely being made to not be taken seriously. The difference here, as you would expect, is that Arlo wants to be taken seriously (which is even more prevalent with his comments on Stunk Station's track WIZARDS). For a guy, let alone an 8 year old, saying that he's a legit crip, he certainly seems to not know all that much about how to find words that rhyme with any of the words that he previously rapped and not repeat the same word over and over again. But I guess it wouldn't matter either way, as the way he presents it almost makes it unclear what he says to the untrained ear... but i'm moving at the speed of sound here, so i'll get to that later. For now, let us break down this guy's lyrics:

Arlo is the best
Arlo is the best
Arlo is the best

Arlo has lots of ice
Arlo has lots of grills
Where's your girlfriend, huh
Sit next to Arlo at the movies
Arlo has a credit card
Arlo going to buy gucci
Arlo loves gucci
Eating cookies, ran out of gucci
Arlo gonna blow up
All you brown pussy go to school
[?] to your grownups
My mom called the dentist, getting my new grills

You are so fire
Yeah i'm so fire
Lil Arlo is the best
ZS prepare to die
You are the best rapper ever
Every other rapper is trash
Every other rapper in the game is trash
So is every other producer
So i'm the best rapper
Every rapper in the world must bow down to me
Arlo's the best, Arlo's the best
Arlo's the best, ZS is the worst
ZS is the worst, ZS is the worst
I don't know what I [?]
Maybe you used to be hard
But you aren't anymore
Your flow is so weird
[here, arlo decides to ramble on about how zs's "flow" makes him trash]
Lil Arlo is so fire
Lil Arlo is so fire
Lil Arlo is so fire
ZS is so bad
He probably plagiarizes all of his songs
I gonna prove it right now
Why do they all seem like other rapper's songs?
Why are 90% of their songs different
Yeah he's so weird
[at this point he goes on and on for the rest of the god damn 4 MINUTES and 20 seconds that this song lasts]

You see what I mean? Literally none of the songs (and yes, there are only 3) even rhyme, and when they do it's just the same sentence said over and over again just to pad out the rapping to the beat's time width. That, speaking of which, doesn't appear to be a thing on the first two songs. These two are literally acapella driven songs. Yet, I still can't understand some of the god damn lyrics. Anyways, without a beat around him, there'd be no explanation needed for you to find any semblance of tempo gone from his flow. He raps as if he's a schizophrenic child speaking with the therapist in a failing attempt to hid his suffering on Racks, while on the previous track, Arlo is the Best, he raps like a enigmatic toddler who is so coped up with playing with his friends, that he makes noises every time he skips. Seriously, it sounds like that when he doesn't have a beat around him. With the ZS diss track, at least Arlo's flow fared better, though not by very much.

Overall though, fuck this ep. Fuck Lil Arlo. Fuck his terrible songwriting. Fuck the lack of logistics it embodies. And overall, fuck Arlo's stupid ego (If it wasn't for that, i would've at least left this shit-stain alone). Yeah, I know that all artists usually start out like this and then improve overtime, and yeah, I've seen myself experience a fair share of improvement as a fellow musician myself. However, that doesn't excuse the crack driven bullshit that this ep spills out of it's vaginal butthole. "But 1027, why are you saying this when your signed to the same label as Submarine Man?" Well, even Submarine Man had more competent rhyme scheme, even if it was always about feet (and also kind of shitty in it's own right). It's just that it was covered in a stupid slab of autotune. With Lil Arlo, he didn't even use that much autotune and he's worse. This was that bad...

Really, when you think about, it does seem like Lil Arlo is a bit of a Bizzaro... Aha! I'll use that as an awesome pun!

Lil Arlo... more like Lil Bizzaro............................................................................................................
............... also 1 point because this ep actually got me to write more than one sentence.
1 Comment
Feb 17, 2020
ZS flies Arlo dies
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