The 1975 - Notes on a Conditional Form
May 22, 2020
Welp, here it is guys. The most predictable fucking thing you're gonna see all fucking day.

That's right! The dude who has sported Matty as my name and picture for like about a year now loves the new record...


Truly surprising.

Bias out of the way, let me try and tell you why I'm right, as I clearly always, or usually, am.

Let's answer the age old question:


Well, let's get into it. Yes, ofcourse something can be both a godawful mess and beautiful, look at me for heaven's sake. Yeah, so this thing has no discernable genres and for someone who dosent follow the 1975, or barely does, you're gonna hate it. You're a rare individual if you can play this front to back as a "non-mega-fan" and not think it's full of filler and pretensious bullshit. I mean, good for you, you arnt crazy and I'm sane enough to understand you're hatred of this blessed masterpiece.

But, wait, theres more.

Look, idk who the hell you are. Anthony Fanta or what ever of your Mr. Pitchfork his pretensious self. You can't just sit on an 80 minute, multi-genre album, and think your brain has concocted some indescribable formula for make the perfect rating without letting that bad boy sit with you for a few minutes. Like, Burial's Unture will only reveal itself to you at 3am while you're half drunk walking home like some weirdo, and that's just how things work.

Okay, so let me just sell you real quick on why I love it, vs., maybe you.

I love all music. All of it. I mean, yeah I hate garbage, but I can play any genre. I remember when streaming concerts was a "thing" for like 2 years (2016, 2017?) I really enjoyed the festivals like Primavera where I could watch every genre in existence in one day.

I enjoy genre blends.

Most people play this album and they come with some sort of bias. I mean, the 1975 are huge and they're in your face. You probably have a certain opinion about them as of now, and I'm sure you prefer some genres over others.

Let me just be a big meany. Some of you just like artsy shit, which is cool, but also a fact.

"If it's not artsy, it gets a rating deduction!"

Like shit, that's exactly what I hate about this site. Why I distanced myself. Sometimes you need to just have fun with an album, and sometimes you gotta just take the gloves off and hate a record we all love.


Like, yeah, this is a polarizing record. Not everyone is gonna love it, and that's cool. I know why you're wrong, but I also CUT MY HAIR LIKE MATTY. Yeah, I said it, clear bias here, and I'm not ashamed. I'll go round for round with you on why you're wrong, I love the damn band. But also, I recognize opinions differ and they change. I think this record is a masterpiece but I'm in the same boat as you: it's new, its fresh, maybe I'll change my mind? We can do that, part of the problem with you stubborn people who need to rate in the first 24 hours, god forbid you lose your "street cred"

Okay, so. The future garage shit is the back bone but it's a kaleidoscope of shit, and I love all of it. Yeah, I fucking love Roadkill, fucking sue me! I'll level with your hate but I also think if you dont like Too Shy your ears dont work.

Love me or hate me, love it or hate it, just enjoy, and for fucks sake

Aoaystheory's Tags
May 22, 2020
Also, during this pandemic bullshit, this was definitely a big highlight. I was excited to be excited about something.
May 23, 2020
Radiohead copy????? Lol Jk jk
May 23, 2020
@DarthSenate66 lol that's one comparison I'll never make. Two entirely different bands, I have no clue where the Kid A comparisons came from.
May 23, 2020
I can't say I'm surprised but I'm seriously glad people are enjoying this album more than I am. Good review bud!
May 23, 2020
@Dombot, thanks man. More of a PSA on a way than a review but I had fun writing it haha. Once we knew it was 22 tracks and 80 minutes I figured a lot of people wouldn't like it tbh. And I knew I would lol, self fulfilling prophecy.
May 23, 2020
I think you really summarized how I feel about this records, like damn is it a mess but it's a damn good mess, I tried to rate it in the first 24 hours but I've changed my rating like 4 times already, just can't put my mind to it.
also, when talking about Primavera, if you're talking about Primavera Sound that god fucking damn it mate, I'm with you 100%
May 23, 2020
@TheFingerDrop, well looks like we just became best friends! Haha
May 23, 2020
Matthew Healy you can't rate your own album a 10/10!
Jokes aside this is a great review, I love this album too, their best and most interesting album yet in my opinion!
May 23, 2020
@Fathead420 haha, you caught me!! Also, I just hit 420 followers bruh, you commented at the perfect moment
May 25, 2020
really didn't like the album myself but it's good to see someone finding so much enjoyment in it! also great review, i totally agree that you can enjoy something despite it being crazily flawed
May 25, 2020
@kazookangaroo it definitely gets better with repeat listens for me atleast! Thanks for the feedback!
May 30, 2020
May 30, 2020
May 30, 2020
yes matty we know its YOUR album of course ur gonna love it
May 31, 2020
@weirdoslam eh, i mean, im glad you went that far with your argument. I wont even shit on you for it
Jun 13, 2020
Imagine give a fuck about Stan's review
Jun 14, 2020
@Melancoholic imagine thinking your lack of opinion matters so much you feel the need to be smug
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