Illinois

We are living in an oppressive, anti-drug society. The way the government prohibits the use of narcotics is simply dictator-like, and if you don't believe me, then we'll take a closer look. As you can see, projected on the 15' by 28' wall behind me, there is clear evidence of drugs actually boosting creativity, and happiness. Further, if we look at more graphs and lines, you can clearly see that people who are on drugs are considerably more sociable. If you still don't believe the benefits of drugs, then we will take a look at the most jarring piece of evidence; Drugs are cool. Alright, now that I have instituted my objective thoughts within your brain shell, I will now show you the full, unfiltered facts. The government is bad! Yes, you've heard it here, folks. The authorities are lying to you. The D.A.R.E PSAs of the past were anti-pharmaceutical propaganda, and that's the plain truth. On top of that, our dear capitalist regime is racist against minorities. Drug dealers, statistically proven to be African American the majority of the time, are in danger of severe punishment. Together, we can stop this. If we legalize every drug, then there will be fewer arrests, better parties, and fewer suicides. If you want ANY of those things, then spread the word to family and friends, and protest! Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.