Metallica - St. Anger
Nov 23, 2020
40
I'm pissed. I was standing near a Baskin Robins when some bitch told me they were closed. Now, nobody interrupts this MALNOURISHED GOOD BOY from getting his DAMN ICE CREAM. I immediately slammed that bitch into the asphalt, causing all of her bones to disintegrate on impact. I stumbled right through the bullet proof glass (I've done this before, trust me guys) with my squishy 600 pound body, and I rolled around until I had my mouth placed right below the cream dispensary. I held my finger down on the rubbery button, and that stupid idiot machine didn't give me cream! Now, I was going into ULTRA RAGE MODE. I sprinted out of that building, hurdling myself at mach 2 at the nearest senior citizen. I yanked down my quintuple XL jeans, and I squirted out 10 metric tons of chicken tender buildup directly into his mouth. Mr. Stevens didn't stand a chance against the Mexican mudslide, and now I get to spend more time with Jenny. Although, I didn't get that ice cream... But mommy comforted me with homemade Chicken tendies and Hunny Mussy™
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Jan 21, 2021
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