Various Artists - The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie: Music from the Movie and More...
Jul 4, 2019
64
(Clam Eater 3000's Ultimate Guide to the Musical Wonders of the Sea: #2)

Hello once again, fellow land mammals! I am your professional marine tour guide, Clam Eater 3000, and today, we are going to again journey down into the vast, open seas to see what awaits us. If this is your first time joining us on these marine adventures, I'd highly advise you bring extra oxygen tanks so we can avoid any sad accidents along the way. Okay? Good.

Today, we are visiting our fresh ol' childhood friends in the isolated wonders of Bikini Bottom. Ahhh, yes, Bikini Bottom. The Goo Lagoon, Le Jellyfish Fields, Boating School, Ze Krusty Krab, what's there to not love about this fictional and possibly radioactive wonderland? We have the iconic set of characters that everyone loves: Spongebob, Patrick, Mr. Krabs, Squidward, Plankton, Pearl, Mrs. Puff, Gary, Sandy, Karen, and most importantly: Nosferatu's Count Orlok from the "Graveyard Shifts" episode.

The true admiration for this generation's most iconic animated TV series and deep sea community is that all of it could have ceased to exist without the genius mind of a Homo sapiens known as Stephen Hillenburg. Stephen Hillenburg not only helped construct the delicate foundations of Bikini Bottom and its surroundings, but his dedication as a showrunner inspired a new generation and built up an everlasting legacy between the great fictional marine world and the human race.

Our heroes Spongebob Squarepants and Patrick Star make the attempt to get back King Neptune's crown from Shell City to save Bikini Bottom from Plankton's rule. In the meantime, Bikini Bottomites, Stephen Hillenburg, famous human pop stars and music icons unite to fabricate a soundtrack that will inspire the new generation and age like fine wine. The result, however, was a mixed bag that range from iconic gems to overblown commercial and mainstream bait.

Our musical shitshow starts off with the horrendous Avril Lavigne pop rock knockoff of the Spongebob Squarepants theme. As the experience continues, we get an inspiring and artfully crafted performance from The Flaming Lips, a boring wilco tune, and then the Goobers make multipe contributions, with Goofy Goober Rock really capturing the hearts of many. Moving forwards, we have the catchy, memorable Prince Paul's Bubble Party, which transitions to the ear-piercing Bikini Bottom tune, which then transitions to the meme-fulfilled classic, The Best Day Ever. We then get the comedic oceanic novelty of Patrick's Under My Rock. Although the classic ocean tune Ocean Man ends off the classic Spongebob adventure, there just so happens to be more songs for you to waste your time on. There's little moments to enjoy too that you would never realize as a child. For example, in Now That We're Men, Spongebob and Patrick's slaps sound pretty damn suspicious... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

You may think that such an influential and inspiring TV series should have deserved a more fulfilling movie soundtrack and that this was all a mistake. Let me remind you that all the music you are witnessing represents a part of our childhoods that we all try and cherish. In the land of Bikini Bottom, we don't call it mistakes, they're just happy accidents. Happy accidents are what got us where we are today in this adventure: in the nuclear wasteland that we once imagined as Bikini Bottom.

And there we go. That concludes my tour guide for today! Let the inner child in you run free in Bikini Bottom! If you ever feel the need to talk, just know that Clam Eater 3000 will be there for you and all your needs. Farewell, my fellow ma--

Oh shit, I just got promoted! MANAGER?! THIS IS THE GREATEST DAY OF MY LIIIFFEE! *Ocean Man begins playing* *roll credits*

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FAV TRACKS: Ocean Man (standout), Spongebob & Patrick Confront The Psychic Wall of Energy, Prince Paul's Bubble Party, The Best Day Ever, Now That We're Men, Goofy Goober Rock, You Better Swim

LEAST FAV TRACKS: Spongebob Squarepants Theme, Just A Kid, Bikini Bottom
1 Comment
Jul 4, 2019
Clam Eater 3000 has taken over Inglume once again! >:(
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