JPEGMAFIA - All My Heroes Are Cornballs
Sep 14, 2019 (updated Sep 21, 2019)
Holy fuck.

This album is the forest, and i'm certain of it. Let's talk about that.

Because, if i'm being honest, I can't really put into words how well crafted, well produced, well made, well executed, well performed and well...genius this album truly is. Because lets be real here, you've heard all of that already. If you want just a basic run through what I think about this album: well, I think this is JPEGMAFIA's victory lap, especially with the way he goes about talking about his newfound fame and his fears around this, with influence from the internet and the culture that comes with fame in the 21st Century.

So that's what I think about the record as a project made by a human. But I think I can summarize what I feel when I listen to this record.

But first, let's talk a little about Veteran. The first time I heard that album was a little after midnight. 1am, to be exact. I couldn't sleep and I just felt drawn to this album. It was as if this album was the right thing at the right time. And I was, right: It was cold, industrial and brutally strange. It was almost like the hip-hop Xiu Xiu, although not as overtly odd. I was really wowed by everything that I was hearing, but it had a very fitting night time coldness that I immediately loved. It was a creature snarling at me.

Now...let's take a look at this album. See, when I first heard this album, I was confused as a motherfucker. It was approximately 7:58am (or around that time), and I just chucked the record on while walking to school. See, I live a little away from my high school, not too far that I need to get a lift, but just enough that I feel tired after walking there. The route of the walk contained a lot of trees, ferns, essentially a lot of nature. It's a scenic route, but still has enough identical houses and straightforward architecture to call itself a suburb. I've never actually taken a proper look at that route until writing this review, and I gotta say it's fucking gorgeous.

Anyway, I popped the album on, and i'm immediately disorientated and flung around the place. Noise filled production, hard and aggressive deliveries and flows, and a titanic amount of strange song structures and avant-garde style song construction seems like it would just be filled with rage, anguish and aggression, right? I mean, that's what Veteran was at lest, so of coarse with his follow up to his breakout project, it's got to be similer right?

Not really. It's very much a warm and wholesome album at places. This album is warm and really similer to the nature around me when I heard it. Even from the song I heard a million times beforehand 'Jesus Forgive Me, I Am A Thot', the first time I heard this album in its entirety, I was lost in the wilderness mentally...and physically. The production is a lot more layered and dense then it's predecessor, with each song feeling like it's tapping into a million different areas and drawing from it's power to create this behemoth of a record that destroys not only JPEGMafia's own expectations but music in general.

Not to say there is no anger at all. Hell, some moments show JPEGMafia at his most aggressive he's ever been. This man hasen't lost a tinge of hunger and spite that loaded his last album. But that doesn't mean that it's all aggression. There are more acoustic guitars and rock-influenced instrumentation then I really expected. It's also a lot more ambient, with a lot more happening in between the sounds that is a lot more atmospheric and subtle. It's just a whole, sprawling event of a record and intensely different experience to anything that JPEGMafia has ever done.

So, back to the forest. See, on the route to my school, there is this bridge. Under that bridge is this beautiful forest of green grass and trees. So, while I was hearing moments like 'Rap Grow Old & No Child Left Behind' or 'Grimy Waifu', all I could see was green grass, sunlight, and water. And...well, it just clicked. I was sitting next to this water puddle, watching the splashes of it as drips of water went on top of it, and just hearing JPEGMAFIA rap, sing, produce his way into my brain. The album immediately went from odd to genius in seconds. Even the weirder moments like the 'No Scrubs' cover, it just all worked. It was hear that I had no choice but give this album a ten. Which is odd for a album with the track 'Thot Tactics' I know, but this is still something I feel connected to. This album is something that I genuinely feel is a part of me. I haven't heard anything like this done this well.

So if Veteran is the night, what is this? This album is a summery ocean of oddness. It's also perfect, and my new front runner for Album of the Year.

Sorry for giving three 10s this year, but holy fuck how could I not with this album. If you disagree that's fine, but honestly I cant find any bad with this shit. Damn.

I'm going back to the forest, with this record as my companion.

Favorite Jams: Kenan Vs. Kel, Rap Grow Old & Die x No Child Left Behind, Free The Frail, PRONE!

Lest Favorite: Nope.

EDIT: I still stand by this album is pretty perfect, but the lack of cohesion in theme brings it down. It's still one of the best of the year

Sep 14, 2019
I won't lie, I can't stand this album. It just sounds like aesthetic goop to me. That doesn't deter the fact that this is incredibly well written on your part. Well done
Sep 15, 2019
@ThrowBackGmac thank you so much! This album is... eccentric to say the least
Sep 15, 2019
Two things.
1. I do not think you would have given this a 10, without the location, I think you would have gave it something close, but not a perfect score.

2. Free The Frail is probably the best JPEGMAFIA song I have ever heard, I have been having it on repeat for the past 2 days since the album's release
Sep 15, 2019
@okcomputer12127 I'm definitely wearing my bus on my sleaves on this one, but goddamn Everytime I hear this album, it feels like a ten
Sep 21, 2019
More Reviews by PipePanic
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