Have a Nice Life - Deathconsciousness
Jan 8, 2020
The nights scare me, a lot. Each night is a struggle to get through alive, to put it bluntly; it would be an understatement to say I don't like the nights yet, I hate sleeping through them. I find my best thoughts come out at night, yet they remain the darkest. I'm not going to lie. I do want to kill myself, quite badly in fact, it's a burning desire that sits with me constantly and never really leaves but, the nights are where it really burns through my skull, leaving a mark, a bruise if you want but, each night I also do something else. Each night I play this album, this record at least once front to back on a speaker and, it helps me. While it probably is the bleakest, most nihilistic album in existence, it helps. I don't feel scared anymore. It is a sad album, there is nothing happy about... anything here. It is an hour and a half of utter emptiness of the soul, but it's done in such a way that even though it feels bleak, it feels empty, it feels devoid of anything hopeful or positive. It still feels reassuring, it still helps me cope. I don't think I'm the only one either who feels this way.

Deathconsciousness is an album unlike any other, and I doubt will ever be replicated as hard as we try. Hell even HANL have tried to replicate the sound in newer records but failed. It's a unique album that, will remain unique. What does it mean though? This album, not just to me but to everyone, to Dan and Tim. It's split into two sides; "The Plow That Broke the Plains" and "The Future" both of these sides have meaning standalone and put together, so let's focus on them alone first. The Plow That Broke the Plains starts from A Quick One and ends on There is no Food. These 7 tracks all have a common theme involved and that's God, the existence of God and his death. The album also showcases death in songs like The Big Gloom and Telephony which, is in fact not showcased anywhere else, which I'll get into shortly. A Quick One opens the record with a sliver of hope, the feeling of the world being destroyed around you as you sit and watch, drink in hand. The reflections of the flames in the glass and in your eyes. This transitions then into Bloodhail, a song about the murder of God, or at least the beginning of it. The Hunter is our "protagonist" I use the term lightly as there is so much more to this than a linear storyline. Bloodhail sees our protagonist preparing for the murder of God; the metaphor at play here is humanity themselves, humanity killing God. The song closes on a sort of cliffhanger, where we see The Hunter having killed God, with their arrowheads; killing not just them but everyone who ever lived, I feel in itself a nod to this sides' title; "The Plow That Broke the Plains" The Hunter being that plow. They have come in, to destroy what was peaceful, just like humanity has done.

The Big Gloom takes us on a minor detour of the main concept, as we see a song about suicide, an incredibly bleak depiction of such, bleak to a point that the song ends in silence, telling us that our narrator is dead. The song deals with the theme of our narrator debating suicide in a bath, an ice bath. They are stuck, mentally and physically bound to this deathbed they have created, the entire track is our narrator debating, speaking of what this may do to the people around them. Now it is left somewhat ambiguous to what happens but my consensus is that the narrator did die, but didn't want to in the end. How does this play into the narrative already set out? Well it doesn't really, but that's not the point, as I said this isn't a linear storyline; this is an enormous record, an enormous world. The Big Gloom can be seen as the suicide of humanity as a whole if you want to look at it that way but, I see it as a detour but an important one, it's something unrelated, and something so minuscule in the grand scheme of the rest of this record that it still feels important. This song also tackles the overarching theme of the record (apart from religion) which is in fact; death. There is no hope in our lives, we have to create that hope and here it is showcased in detail, what can happen if we don't. The song also showcases something else important, another theme tackled by the record in detail, and that's the selfishness of humanity. Some could deem suicide as selfish and in a way, yes it is. Here we see that in detail, with how the lyrics are written: "Please release me". Me, it's about me. While the song does talk about other members of our narrator's life, it still ultimately ends on the word; me. The Hunter takes us back to our original storyline on the titular protagonist. Here we see the continuation of Bloodhail. Our perspective is shifted to one of God themself, lying on the floor, wounded by arrows. They have fallen from the heavens and down to the earth, The Hunter walks down a staircase made from humanity; a staircase of hatred and power, what The Hunter lives on, killing all in its path, even God. The song then shows God, even in their final moments, being generous and kind, something The Hunter never does. God lets the animals and The Hunter eat their flesh to survive if necessary. God doesn't cling on to life, they give in and let humanity win. This is quite an obvious metaphor once again, harkening back to how The Hunter themself is a metaphor for humanity as a whole, they are the plow. Humanity has killed God for their own pleasure, their own selfish desires. God is dead, and we killed him, as they say anyway.

From here we depart slightly from our main storyline about The Hunter. In Telephony we're taken back to another personal account of a person in grief, this time grief not of themself but of someone else. The song revolves around our narrator building a phone that can also travel through time. The song speaks again of the selfishness of humanity in getting what they want, however much they justify their desires. "The machine that snaps, All of time in half" Although our narrator is attempting, and succeeds in speaking to their deceased loved ones, at what cost? Who Would Leave Their Son Out in the Sun is another song in our storyline, while loosely based in it, and does not feature The Hunter nor God, it still plays a part; and is the lyrical closer to this side. This song deals with the theme of Christ himself, the son of God, hence the name. This song also links together both of the main story themes shown to us so far, the themes of selfishness and religion, we see both of those at play here. This is also the first showcase of humanities denial of religion. "But there aren't enough archangels in the sky to come down (and), To make me feel right". The Hunter's influence has changed the present. We then see a contrast of, our narrator, whoever that may be on a metaphorical cross. Speaking their selfishness at the world "Everyone spends some time on the cross, I just want to make sure it's not a total loss, so maybe I'll get tanned, and lose some weight while I wait". Jesus was put on the cross and died for our sins, these lines show us that humanity doesn't care; selfishness is a sin is it not? This song shows us humanity as a whole, without The Hunter being there to influence, as they already have.

The closing track of side one is an instrumental song; a song linking the two sides in a way in There is no Food. This is a song that I can best describe as the suffering of modern-day humanity, in the noises we hear (which I know is partly Tim reciting a poem), they sound like the screams and suffering of the innocent, people who have done nothing to deserve any of this, but still suffer our consequences. The "Plow" has been done, by The Hunter themself, and now we suffer the consequences. The said "Plow" is our own selfishness towards everything, we will get what we want, whatever it takes.

Now onto Side two: The Future, I've probably already used most of my characters here so, sorry for that but, side two takes us on a bleaker journey. Here we see little mention of The Hunter, they are still here of course but, not mentioned by name; The Hunter is a metaphor anyway for humanity, which is what this side mainly focuses on, till its end. We open with Waiting for Black Metal Records; which in its name is a showing of humanities tolerance towards everything going on around them, it lyrically proves this too. The song deals with the theme of genocide in a way, and our intolerance towards it. We see the world being destroyed in front of us, by us but do nothing, we may say we will, but we ultimately won't do anything, and all we will do is sit around, waiting... for black metal records to come in the mail. Holy Fucking Shit then takes us into a bleak society, following on from the previous track, this is where we see humanity really fall apart, we see the metaphor used for replacing our hearts with metal parts and, how far is that from the truth? We're programmed to feel whenever we see genocides but do we really feel anything? The title in itself is also a double entendre. It's a reference to Warhammer yes, but also a reference to the annual suicide rates in America (at least at the time) which was 40,000. When we see that number, what do we feel, it may be sadness but we don't feel anything. That number is too large to comprehend so we move on. The song also compares humans to animals, as that is what we truly are. "And wolves all tear themselves apart better in packs". We are machines that breathe and weep and look really good. Trained to kill.

The title track to this side can be explained in one sentence: The Future is an instrumental track because there is no future. In more detail though, this song is an important one as it sets up the final leg of the album, the closing three songs after this are the most important on the entire album. This song is bleak and empty, there is nothing but beeps and mechanical noises, because that's what our future will be.

This is even foreshadowing to the closing track of the album, which I'll get into don't worry. We move onto Deep, Deep next, the final stretch of the record. These are the three most important tracks, to me at least. Deep, Deep deals with the overarching theme of the album really, in fact all these songs do. It's all been building up to these moments. Deep, Deep though specifically, deals with humanity as a whole, the destruction of humanity, which we know is happening, but do nothing. The song opens with a reference to sex, lust even, before contrasting it to the sex of animals. While we do it for pleasure they do it for necessity. Animals don't look for a specific "soulmate" they only want the sex, to procreate. We'd like to say that humanity is different but, ultimately it is not. The song also has our narrator screaming up to Christ himself, asking him; "Jesus Christ, why is love so lonely?"
This entire song remains bleak and devoid of all hope, yet it still is not the darkest song on the record. The song also hints towards an extinction event that has either happened or will happen (likely has not happened as that happens later on), but it begs the question, what would we do? Would we all just fizzle out of existence, never to be heard from again, goodbye humanity, or would we continue to live on? We say we are an intelligent species but ultimately, we are still animals; animals who kill for sport.
I Don't Love. I Don't Love is a song that speaks to me a lot personally, more than any other song on this record, more than any other song has in recent years, even my all-time favourite song. I'd like to get personal now, while writing about this song, this review is already incredibly long there's no harm in doing so is there? I mentioned earlier about those suicidal feelings, the want to kill myself, in fact I've mentioned them a couple of times in the past three reviews, but I'd like to hone in on it here as; this song describes exactly how I feel most of the time, an empty husk of a person, feeling nothing at all.
My head could be seen as split into two halves, one half is my normal, positive side in which I am happy and caring, then there is my other side, which is apathetic, uncaring, suicidal. It feels nothing, it blocks out all emotion and wishes nothing but death upon itself. This song describes that better than anything ever has. I Don't Love is an important song to me because it speaks to me in such a profound way that, I need it almost. I don't love. I don't feel anything. I don't feel anything where this love should be. Those lines repeated over and over, I want to feel something, anything, please. I'm not hollow. I want to feel... anything. Death is something, I feel.
The song itself, in context is also incredibly important, from what I've described, is what the song means in the context of the album; humanity feeling nothing but numbness to everything. Calling to Christ for help. This can also be seen as The Hunter themself calling to Christ, sorrowfully, wishing him back but to no avail of course. Christ has left us as we have killed him. This song shows the true decline of humanity, into absolute nothingness; this is the bleakest, most depressing song on this record; yet it never makes me cry. It makes me feel worse than tears. It makes me feel empty. We are empty.
This then takes us to the closing track, Earthmover. This is one of the most powerful songs, ever made. It is a song that transcends words and leaves you speechless each and every time. This is what this entire album has led to, this moment, this 11 minute behemoth of a track, larger than life, larger than death. Earthmover describes an apocalyptic event, that wipes out all of humanity, in fact it does more than that. It wipes out the entirety of the universe, it wipes out everything that has ever been and everything that ever will be, nothing is left.
These golems described are the only things left as, they cannot be abolished "nothing hurts them, nothing gets under their stone skin". They are stuck to roam the emptiness that they have left behind. That in fact we left behind; these golems are man-made, we have created these beings to kill us. Not intentionally of course but it has led to such. We have weapons of mass destruction, that could wipe out the entire planet. This song is that. It is the destruction of everything we know.
The song ends on one of the most powerful lines in my opinion musical history: "And when their earthen mouths will open up, and just what words should come out but, "We wish we were dead"". This is the line that closes the entire record, before it kills itself, quite literally in fact. As the lines are uttered from these golems themselves, these golems that cannot be killed, cannot be destroyed, all they know is destruction and nothing more; they are left to plow the plains, destroy the future. They wish for the sweet release of death, but it will never arrive. As they wander these plains one final time and utter these words... it all ends. The album kills itself along with the rest of this universe. The outro to this song is masterful, it is beyond description of how it makes me feel. It is something I just cannot describe and I implore you to listen for yourself if you haven't.
And with that Deathconsciousness comes to an end, a bleak, empty end. Nothing is left, all is lost. We have killed all. I would like to take this time now to just, talk a little like I did at the beginning of this review. This album helps me a lot in an interesting way, considering its bleakness and overall theme of eventual nothingness, shouldn't it make me feel worse? Well no, it doesn't in fact it makes me feel better. From beginning to end, it feels bleak, it is soul-destroying but, what makes this all the more powerful is that there is no happy ending.
Humanity won't have a happy ending but, we can try. We can try to make sure that we don't end up like this world the album has created and, that gives me hope. In an album devoid of anything good, it still leaves you feeling different than when you went in, it is an album that changes people. I do feel this is the most powerful album ever created, an album beyond anything that has been made and will be made, while it isn't my favourite album when it probably should be, it sits tied with Twin Fantasy. It's a record that is important to music as a whole. We have sown the seed, we have plown the plains, all we have left now is the future. It is what we make it. Thank you for reading and, I love you all a lot.
What a review. Might be review of the year for me, this is incredibly powerful writing! Truly keep up the good work, and hope your doing alright!
Furry Music Dude I really I hope that u are really ok, and this is not a joke just for the album, I really hope happiness in your life and sense of life, maybe the life has no meaning at all, but we have bodies and we know what are we doing, and even all has an end we can still enjoy our things, this is nothing compared to your review, and I really i understand your feelings, but I really I hope the best, nice review tho
Jesus Fucking Christ
I think they like the album
2 years later but I hope you are happy now and don't kill yourself please
@ProdZenith I'm doing much better now than I was!! Don't worry
Powerful words. I hope to review as expressively as you do someday. I'm glad to hear you're doing better than you were at the time of writing this, this album has got me through plenty of hard times as well.
holy fucking shit i did not expect one of the greatest reviews i’ve ever read to be from someone called furry music lol
Holy shit this is one of the most expansive reviews I've ever seen and it you didn't let anything stay hidden, also w opinion on a w album also, did you get help? Can you sleep through nights now?
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