Sixpence None the Richer

We've had the Weebapalooza:

https://www.albumoftheyear.org/user/toasterqueen12/album/326170-girls-reform-manifest/

We've had the Kidapalooza:

https://www.albumoftheyear.org/user/toasterqueen12/album/353666-dandelions/

Now I present:

THE MINIVANAPALOOZA (patent pending)

You know bands like Wheatus? That safe radio friendly soft rock that haunted stations in the late 90s early 00s? That safe watered down rock music for soccer mom GARBAGE!? Yeah. I kinda like that stuff honestly.

Idk how to describe it. I just like all genres! Like this isn't my favorite genre but I always think that weird simi-scenes and trends that emerge in popular music is cool. In the same way I have a lot of nostalgia for the ho-hum era of rock music in the early 10s I think this sound is charming. Plus like come on. You're gonna say you don't like Teenage Dirtbag? Closing Time? She's So High, Stacy's Mom, Kiss Me, Thousand Miles? You're gonna hate that!? C'mon.

Anyways, I thought it'd be fun to shake a stick at this scene. See if it's produced anything worthwhile that should allow the scene to gain some cred. So I picked the usual 7 albums and here they are!!!

SR-71 - Now You See Inside
(41/100)
Genre: Pop Punk, Pop Rock

For the record I'm a very big fan of "Right Now" with all that teenage angst and rebellion. I find it not only an extremally well structured song but honestly one of my favorite pop punk songs of all time. I also knew I never wanted to listen to the album this comes from because it has one of the worst openers in album history. With a song about how everything is too politically correct nowadays and you couldn't make Blazing Saddles today. It's essentially a very shitty pop punk version of a Tom Macdonald song. It's a song so bad it makes me wonder do I even like Right Now that much. I certainly don't like the rest of the album!

Vanessa Carlton - Be Not Nobody
(45/100)
Genre: Singer-Songwriter, Pop Rock

Why does this sound like garbage? A Thousand Miles is of course a classic but why does every other song sound artificially slowed down and using a cheep fake piano modulator? Doesn't help that besides A Thousand Miles zero exciting moments happen on the entire album. Well there is a really horrible Paint It Black cover....that's a little exciting.

Nine Days - The Madding Crowd
(68/100)
Genre: Pop Rock, Alternative Rock

This is a story of an album with only one song I'll ever be returning to.

Tal Bachman - Tal Bachman
(73/100)
Genre: Pop Rock, Power Pop

I'll let you in on a secret of mine. If your song features any classical or fantastical or "fancy" imagry at all, I'm gonna like it. It's my favorite songwriting cliche to just cram as many literary and historical ideas into one song as possible, it's why I love Vampire Weekend. This album is right up my alley because of that, plus it's pretty fun.

Atheist - Unquestionable Presence
(78/100)
Genre: Technical Death Metal, Progressive Metal

WHO THE FUCK PUT THIS HERE!?

Deep Blue Something - Home
(80/100)
Genre: Alternative Rock, Pop Rock

God I adore how apathetic this band is. I mean look at that band name. They do not give a SHIT about their own existence. Like fuck angst. Fuck sadness. Breakfast at Tiffany's is one of the most depressing songs ever created by just how accurately it displays the mediocrity of a dying romance. The whole album kind of carries this tone, it's kind of incredible. I don't know if most people would get something out of it but I find the album and band kind of charming in just how little they care.

And my favorite of course has to be:

Sixpence None the Richer - Sixpence None the Richer
(86/100)
Genre: Pop Rock, Jangle Pop

WOAH TOASTER!? YOU LIKE THE WOMAN FRONTED ROCK BAND THAT SINGS SAPPY SONGS ABOUT ROMANCE AND FEATURES A FOLK AND JANGLE POP SOUNDSCAPE THAT ALSO CONTAINS LYRICS WITH FANTASTICAL IMAGERY? YOU LIKE KISS ME DON'T YOU? YOU WATCH DAWSON'S CREEK AND GILMORE GIRLS PROBABLY. YOU- YOU ARE A WOMAN. YOU HAVE..YOU HAVE WOMAN EMOTIONS! YOU HAVE TERMINAL WOMAN BRAIN..

BITCH!

This is the least suprising Toaster opinion of all time, stream Kill Me: https://youtu.be/rsF5EWOQN9Y

And that's it for the MINIVANAPALOOZA (patent pending). Yeah this is a fun scene in music. Like of course I don't want all music ever to sound this way but for like a period of 5 years I think this was a fun sound to look back on. I might due this type of thing again for Ho Hum or Asshole Rock. Who knows. All I know is that I gotta pick up my kids from soccer practice.

*Drives off playing There She Goes*