James Hetfield's awful karaoke is borderline insufferable. Disc one sees the band ruining other artists' songs in spectacular fashion, or covering songs better left forgotten, like Loverman, or much of Mercyful Fate's low-effort Satanic fanfare. Whiskey in the Jar is a perfectly lovable song, but sounds drastically worse when surrounded by the rest of this garbage.

Disc two was recorded largely in the 80's, and it shows. James Hetfield's ego has yet to expand beyond ... read more

Death Magnetic is a massive return-to-form for Metallica, being their first thrash metal album in nearly 20 years. The loud and crunchy production is actually a little flat, but fades into the background as you get lost in the riffs and creative song structures. Everything bad about the album is relegated to The Day That Never Comes, a song that sees the band trying to recreate One, and failing categorically. Skip that track and you've got a great album on your hands, that deserves to be ... read more

AJR seem to have matured, only so far as the bandmembers realizing (ten years late) that they're actually adults. But rather than improving themselves, this album sees them blaming the rest of the world for their problems. Which ironically helps me relate to them, because I too am a cynical asshole. The difference being that I blame AJR for all the world's problems.

To prove that they're adults now, they say "fuck" a lot, and talk about God sometimes. God, you see, is ... read more

I have always had a soft spot for this album simply because it's Metallica playing metal again, rather than the country-tinged party rock of the Load era. When comparing these albums honestly however, if this is an improvement, it's marginal at best. The songwriting here is atrocious, and if you need any evidence of this, check out any number of fan covers of the album. There is no level of production quality that will make Invisible Kid or the title track into decent songs. They are ... read more

Simply a legendary album, with no shortage of amazing beats, unforgettable rhymes, and brilliant sample work. A narrative follows the entire record, and the episodic updates throughout the tracklist are consistently exciting, and just as memorable as any of DOOM's verses. Also as impressive are the featured artists, who absolutely make every track they appear on. DOOM's genius is on display with every arrangement here.

I think I prefer Reload simply because it has fewer terrible songs than Load. The songwriting here may be more bland, but at least it's less offensive. There is notably less country influence here compared to its predecessor, and a stronger focus on blues riffing. The opener Fuel is inarguably iconic, and it's easy to see why, even if I don't quite care for it. The Memory Remains is kinda trash, but is so strange a song that I can't bring myself to hate it. The guest artist ... read more

This is marginally better than either Neotheater or The Click. Absent are many of the more annoying features of their music, be it childish sample work, annoying chipmunked vocals, or YEP YEP YEPs. There are fewer songs here that disgust or anger me, and a few more that are actually almost good. Bummerland is almost as decent as I wish it were. Bang is actually a pleasant oasis of decency among the surrounding tracks.

The OK Overture upsets me. The Click's Overture was pleasantly smooth, ... read more

This thing is a pain to listen to, a pain to look at, a pain to think about. The blues-influenced riffing occasionally works on a few tracks, and there are some really endearing solos and instrumental passages, but knowing what the album does right only makes it that much more irritating. James cannot sing, insists on delivering every line-ahhh with the same infuriatinggg-ahhh drawn out twang-ahhh, and seems incapable of closing his mouth when he finishes a thought. I wish he'd learn how, and ... read more

This music is the aesthetic equivalent of a cartoon child wearing a sailor hat, licking a large lollipop.

If somebody told me before listening to this album, that it would feature a chorus of rapping babies, I would have been skeptical. I regret to report this is true however. The song Birthday Party is a horribly-produced track sung from the perspective of a baby with under-developed political ideals. Which, to be fair, is an appropriate description for the members of the group.

As was true ... read more

It's hard to explain just how boring this album is. It's loaded with iconic radio hits that completely leave my mind as soon as they're over. I can't tell you how many times I've listened to this thing, but whenever revisit near any song, I'm surprised by what I'm hearing because I could remember next to nothing about it. Sad But True, Unforgiven, and Wherever I May Roam are hits for a reason. They're not bad songs. They're just bland. Everything here is very bland, subdued, and simply ... read more

I'm not sure if AJR makes music for impressionable children, or for grown adults with the maturity level of children, but the realization that both of these groups fraternize at the same high school house parties frightens me. With lyrical themes such as "I don't want to grow up" and "I don't want my girlfriend to grow up" and "I wish I was still in second grade" and "PARTY PARTY PARTY DRINK DRINK DRINK SMOKE WEED EVERY DAY" the best you can really hope ... read more

This is Twenty One Pilots' most focused, consistent, and inoffensive project. While I don't care much for the sound of the album, there is there is very little here that I could call bad. Hearing the stereotypical emo inflections in Tyler Joseph's singing is bothersome knowing his tendency to adopt fake accents in a vain attempt to fabricate authenticity. But hey, at least he isn't putting on his Jamaican accent for the Reggae passages. The few rap verses here are drastically less terrible ... read more

Regional At Best is effectively a pre-Vessel demo tape, and a few songs are shared between the two projects. Guns For Hands and Holding On To You are much less bombastic than their Vessel counterparts, and generally make for a more relaxed and enjoyable listen. By comparison, this record's version of Ode To Sleep is just worse in every way.

This album actually proves that the awful rap performances on Vessel were not an accident, as Tyler Joseph nails the exact same awful delivery in every ... read more

Nothing that you hear on Vessel is Twenty One Pilots at their best. The production is shoddy, the song gimmicks are transparent and awkward, and the rapping is terrible. It's odd that such a weak point in the band's musicianship takes center stage as often as it does. Some songs, like Guns For Hands especially, will bend and contort themselves around a ham-fisted rap verse, completely breaking the song.

The very very many rap verses across this album are often paired jarringly against ... read more

Blurryface showcases what makes Twenty One Pilots so likeable, as well as everything that makes their music so unlikeable. Ambitious genre blends, outside-the-box writing, and experimental ideas which are rarely executed well, or perhaps not at all, on this particular album.

Laughable EDM rave banger breakdowns on Polarize, Lane Boy, and Message Man only hurt the overall experience of the songs, and the album as a whole. Doubt features perhaps my favorite lyrics of any Twenty One Pilots song, ... read more

Drake is back again and trying to strike a chord... But there is nothing of artistic substance here outside of the original tune, which is worse off for the existence of this garbage.

Lyrics such as "girls need to stop being mean to me, I literally have a gun" definitely go over very well.

I'm having a mental breakdown listening to this album again for this review. My score continues to drop with each repeated listen. I for a while believed that Mulberry Street was likely the worst song here, being so painfully unoriginal and sappy that I can't stomach the idea of listening to it. But the gross tackiness of tracks like Never Take It, and to a lesser degree Choker, have me questioning what music is even supposed to sound like. Good Day is a good opening track, as it sets the tone ... read more

There is a lot of depth and intrigue to this album. It took several listens for many of the tracks to really set in, and in some ways they still are settling in my mind. The production overall is great, the instrumentation sounds amazing, and every track here feels both spacious and full. The problem however, is that many of the songs themselves are just not good, and those that are rather good simply don't live up to their full potential. The first five tracks show promise, aside from the ... read more

While not offensively bad, this sounds like a very desperate attempt to recapture decades-passed relevance, delivered awkwardly over rejected Scooby Doo chase music, with a chorus that sounds appropriately childlike.

The beat sucks, the flow is insufferable and embarrassing, and the lyrics are only worse. Kendrick Lamar did something to this man.